Love vs Infatuation

All your life, or looks like so, you have been waiting for person who made your pound of the heart, done the shining stars, and assumed the control all the reasonable processes of the thought with ideas to make love in each beach of here to Tahití. You have a strange expression in your face, the food looks like suddenly as a mere inconvenience and the dream is just something that you did.

Your friends tease you about being in the love. Your mother INFORMS YOU about being in the love. Naturally, you are not stupid. You were around (more than the mom knows), and you spent time in the meditation/therapy having explored your own needs in the world. You want a companion of heart but this type/gallon is so sexy simply that it is difficult to imagine to present him/it at your parents of the whole.

Love is Forever Changing

Love as a dynamic process. For me, that means that there is a relationship that flexes, changes and grows as people mature, experience happens upon them, priorities and dreams are built and goals are met. Love brings out the best in people as individuals. The relationship between them becomes the way they define their lives. As jobs, careers, and family concerns change, people are able to work as a team to be understanding and flexible so the relationship (their lives) will flourish.

The dynamic process of the love equalizes a division of the emotion, confidence, and growth of the relationship. The growth increases the capacity of a couple of living symbiotically, appreciates each other company, trusts each other with more secrecies, depends on other in more crises during years, by raising children and by taking care of the parents of ageing. It is about aging together, and of the long-term investments like real estate and the children.

Is it Just Infatuation?

As would you say infatuation? Thats when you think of somebody any hour, you leave your manner of being around him/her it, and you start to concentrate your priorities on him/her as well. There is history with this person: Perhaps a short history, but perhaps completely a moment. You both have pleasure to be together. You rêvassez about one the other and obtain all crawly in your underclothing. But is this love? I want to say, hates you to be wrong about this kind of thing, perhaps particularly if you have with the together reproducing spirit (or perhaps if you forget to think that just once). Infatuation as define it here, is a static process characterized by a not very realistic hope of happy passion without positive growth and development. Characterized by a lack of confidence, the lack of fidelity, the lack of engagement, misses reciprocity, a infatuation is not necessarily foreplay for a scenario of love. People, however, have many reasons to make engagements.

Most people are infatuated with their love partners to a certain degree. People who are in love think of their partners periodically when they are apart (some more than others). Men seem to be better, in general, in compartmentalizing their lives, thereby putting thoughts of loved ones aside until the mind is free to dwell on life. And yes, there are many exceptions and many ranges within the genders.

Knowing the Difference?

So how do you know? The question, actually is simple, the answer, however, is not easy to own or accept. And here it is: Does this relationship bring out the best in both of you?
This is the part where you get to assess and evaluate yourself and your partner, and your relationship honestly.

Though difficult, evaluating how things are going at regular intervals can help to give some direction (and re-direct misdirection) to people who are self-guided toward happiness and success. For those who are on a negative course, people who are unhappy, confused and perhaps self-sabotaging, regular evaluation can point out some hard truths about oneself, and/or about the person you want to take the next step with.

While you try to evaluate whether or not it is the real thing, here are some things to consider:

Are you happy? That would be a yes or no. When you wake up, are you glad to be alive? Are you grateful for the blessings that you receive daily, like being alive and loved? Are you loved and treated as a person of value? Does his or her mother know about you?

Is your life on a positive track?
Do you have hope for the future?
Do you have dreams and work toward them all the time?
Is your life better because your boy/girlfriend is in it? Really?

Are you in this relationship alone? Having someone on your arm makes life less complicated. You get a built in escort and date. Most people seem to think and feel better as part of a pair. There is a sense of social relief as well meaning family and friends stop trying to fix you up. Are you thinking and planning as a pair? Do you automatically consider both of your plans for the weekend, or merely anticipate maybe meeting up sometime? Have you postponed or given up your hopes and dreams for the relationship or have you restructured your dreams together?

Bringing it Into Reality

Infatuation can even be thought of as love with only 2 dimensions. With love, that third dimension is reality. So, it is actually your ability to tell what is real in a relationship, versus what is imagined. You love being part of a couple, but is this the person you want to be in a couple with?

Look at the reality of who this person is, not who she/he wants to be. Do you always interact over dinner and drinks? Meet under different circumstances. Become part of each other's lives. If that is not happening, why not? Are you spending and enjoying time together? What happens when you're apart? Are you sure?

Trying to differentiate your love interest from your lust interest is requires a level head and the courage to face the unpleasant. It also requires maturity and the ability to take a step back and survey the big picture. The result is more control and confidence as you stride your way in love's direction.

Determining the Difference

The answers, and the courage to face the facts is the key to making the determination. In infatuation, your gaze, your thoughts and maybe your world revolves around someone. You have blinders on. It seems that all the world pales in comparison to this person's looks, talents, intelligence, creativity, etc. What you might not see by keeping the blinders on, what can be serious flaws in any relationship, are the destructive traits and behaviors that degrade self esteem and cause some pretty negative effects on one's choices and decisions.

Many have had the experience of looking back at some early romance, in middle or high school perhaps, when we were 'in love' with a special teacher, or camp counselor. It can be easier to see in retrospect, what you weren't ready to see at the time. Your thoughts of
romance were simply an innocent fantasy: An infatuation that felt like love at the time.

Aside from your age, what was it about you that made you make that mistake. Innocence? Loneliness?: A longing to grow up, maybe. But those were things going on in your head. In fact, these feelings had little to do with the actual object of your infatuation (crush). It could be that some of those same feelings and needs exist for you today. Beware of your own vulnerability, and your own desire to 'get rescued' from that solitary life of the unpaired.

In time, the faults that you refuse to see will begin to come to the foreground. You may be infatuated with a rich and powerful person, but as you come to know that person on a more intimate basis, the qualities that intrigued you will begin to fade into the background.

In the case of love, your focus is on your special someone, and that someone exists in the real world. Give and take, compromise and cooperation are characteristics of love relationships. Working toward common goals, sharing dreams and values define the dynamics of a good love relationship. People know each other on a separate and private level than the world at large.